confusedjaz

newest
older
profile
notes
guestbook
rings
email
host
design

he= asshole, sarcastic, jealous, angry, depressed. he also= funny, smart, quick, deep, loyal, gorgeous.

no matter how hard i try to get him outof my head, something prevents that. its like im destined to have him in my life, in some form.

i always feel like i need to take care of him, protect him. its been said that women are inherently nurturers. i guess that side of me comes out with him. if anything would ever happen to him, i honestly dont know how id cope.

what scares me though, is the dark side of his personality. ive seen how deep in the hole he can go sometimes and the way he treats me in those moments....the many times he's caused me to cry. im torn between keeping him in my life and taking care of him in my own little way, or gettin away to save myself from the emotional trauma and tears that i know he will be bringing to the table. ah. confusedjaz.

i wrote this today, it kinda sucks:

my dreams for the future are estinguished-

like a blossoming spring flower flattened and killed by an ugly gray rainstorm-

SO MUCH POTENTIAL..

yet ripped apart in the blink of an eye.

2002-04-30
12:23 a.m.

<< // >>